I just heard the news about young Owen Black, who had been missing since Friday, that he had been found dead in waters off Perdido Key. My heart breaks for this family. But this comes so recently on the heels of the news of Mikaela Lynch who also sadly drowned, in California. My heart breaks for her family as well. I ask if you could keep these families in your prayers as they are mourning the loss of their precious gifts… their children.
I can’t speak enough about autism and wandering, and the dangers that revolve around this. I recently shared a blog post – Wandering and Autism: The Scary Reality – and I invite you to read it, and learn a little more about this very serious issue that we, as parents, have on our hands.
This is my biggest fear! Hands down! Too many people that I speak with, when my son is not in my care, DON’T take me seriously when I talk about him being a flight risk. Many seem to think that parents who share these stories are over-protective, hovering parents that won’t let their children out of their sight… that won’t let them grow up! Well, you know what? I’d like to see my son grow up which is why I can’t let him out of my sight – at least not for long. I even sleep with one eye open!! However, truthfully, I am thankful that we have never had an issue that happens at night, and I hope we never do! My friends, you have the right… you have the ability… to speak for your children to ensure they are safe. Please, don’t let someone take that right away from you! Make sure your concerns are heard!
My son used to sleep with me while hubby was at work. Do you think that I’d turn down the opportunity to ensure that I knew that he was beside me and he was safe. Some of you might think that is strange, but I invite you to walk in the shoes of a parent with a child that wanders… or that is a runner. It’s a reality that I wouldn’t wish on anyone and it’s one of the only things that truly scares me about my son’s autism.
Parents, if you have a child that exhibits elopement or wandering behaviours, don’t take it lightly. Don’t let anyone else tell you that you don’t need to worry about it. Do you need to be paranoid? I don’t think so, but I do think that you need to be prepared, aware and educated.
Do what you need to do to ensure your child is safe!
I invite you to check out some of these websites for more information on wandering, autism and autism risk management.
My daughter has had a full-time aide for five years, and next year the school attempted to cut that support to two class periods… as she enters middle school! AFter running away several times (once to be found by the police), she isn’t yet able to not leave the campus. Yet the school says she’ll be fine, that they’ll watch her. PE at this new school takes place in an unfenced field along a major highway with three adults supervising 122 children for an hour. I’m already breathing hard.
I feel for you… it was similar circumstances that had us have to pull our son from the public school system. Safety should be one of the top two (medical being the other) reasons for aides at school. Don’t give in and keep fighting Lorca. Your daughter needs you to keep fighting. If the police have been involved (which I am sorry that it had gotten to that point – very scary), there should be documentation. Can you go to your school board and those that are in the positions to make these changes? I’m not sure where you are, but here in Canada, our schools have principals and above them, superintendents… above them… the director of education – that’s where we finally had to go! Don’t give up! Those numbers are not enough – 3 adults for 122 students when at least one is a proven flight risk!?!?! What are they thinking?! Please feel free to email me anytime (info@mom-ology.ca) – even if you just want to vent to someone that understands… I HAVE been there. Last thing I’ll say is if you are able, it might be worth even having a consultation (some offer them free) with a lawyer just see what your rights are in your area. Outside of that there are advocates that may be able to offer similar services. Good luck!!
This is so sad. Children are mesmerized by water and it’s so hard for them to appreciate the dangers until it’s too late. Those poor families to not only have to deal with their loss but also the guilt.
You do an amazing job to bring awareness, Jen.
It’s true Cindy – water, as beautiful as it is, can be a very dangerous environment. We’ve just talked about putting in a pool here but truthfully at the end of the day, it’s stories like these that keep me from ‘taking the plunge’. I pray these families find peace… somehow. Thanks for saying that my friend – means alot to hear 🙂 Hope that you have an amazing day!
Jen, it is so great that you are getting this message out. I am a teacher, and in my seventeen years in education, I can back you by saying that we do have to be very careful in our supervision with children who are a flight risk. They are so very fast, smart and yet can be naive and / or impulsive at the same time. Things could go wrong so quickly. There are things that can be put in place as tools to help (i.e. a doormat with a doorbell in it), but nothing replaces supervision. Just as a lifejacket or another floatation device may promote a little more independence in the water for a less confident swimmer, it does not replace the adult. This could have happened to any parent of a young and / or impulsive or naive child. Condolences to these families. I can’t imagine their loss.
Thanks for saying that 🙂 and may I say thank YOU for being one of few that I have dealt with in the education field that recognize that this is a HUGE issue. It’s a difficult scenario with funding always being cut, but a child’s safety HAS to be taken seriously! You are so right that with anything, nothing replaces adult supervision!!